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What do we tell the Children?

  • Try to answer questions as truthfully & simply as you can
  • Make sure you leave plenty of time, so that you don't feel rushed
  • Tell them you're getting separated or divorced
  • Reassure them that you both still love them, and that the decision to separate was not their fault
  • That you will keep loving them and stay involved in their lives
  • That you feel sad about the break-up and they are likely to feel sad as well
  • That you will all work together to feel better, but this might take time
  • Encourage them to be open about how they feel even if it is difficult for you to hear
  • Be prepared to answer the same question many times
  • Don't expect your children to choose between you or take sides
  • Resist the temptation to criticise or insult your ex-partner
  • Remember, your relationship as a couple is over but your relationship as parents is not

Mediation is about making positive agreements so that you can move on with your life.

"Our mediator did a tremendous job and acted impartially. You all do a great job"

"My husband and I were at total gridlock. We were able to use the experience of mediation to come to an agreement - wonderful"

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